Update: Docs are all on the same page, which is fantastic, but we have to find out from the manufacturers in Canada if having the therasphere beads done again is a viable option and what the side affects will be. So patiently I will wait :-)
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This weekend was brilliant! Friday I had a dinner party with friends I had not seen in months and saturday was spent with friends I had not seen in years. Both evenings were filled with stories of way-back-when and hilarious memories of when we were young and invincible. The most amazing thing about it all was that as much as all of them had aged (just a little) and their lives taken different paths, none of them had really changed at all. This got me thinking about all the change I have been through over the last few years.
You cannot go through the fight of your life without it affecting you. It has to change you. It will make you stronger, perhaps wiser, definitely more spontaneous and without a doubt more aware of yourself as not so invincible after all. But those are all emotional changes. Does facing death change how you look? Ok fair enough, surgery leaves you with scars, for some chemo sheds those unwanted kilo's when you need them the most, and for others, you swell up like a balloon. I had the misfortune of getting the 'you constantly have to eat or you will die' cancer, so I was enormous... but that's a whole other story. Although I have managed to loose alot of the weight I was wondering if I look as different as I feel. I keep looking at old pictures of the young me. But they were only taken 3 years ago! Is this huge change in my psyche reflected on my face? Do I look different to people or do I look the same except for some weight gain and new, rather unruly curls on my head. Do people see the change as much as I see it. As much as I feel it?
The even bigger question is... Have I embraced this change or am I secretly hoping one day I will look like the old me again? Hm!
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